Wednesday, 31 January 2018

Benefits of Cuticle Oil Day 3

I have already talked about the benefits of Cuticle Oil for your skin, but it also has benefit for your nails.  

Your nails also benefit from Cuticle Oil. They will become more flexible because of the oil, which prevents them from becoming brittle and dry, so the polish is less likely to chip. Cuticle Oil also helps keep the polish pliable, which will further reduce chipping. You’ll really be amazed at the difference it makes when you apply it every day.

You may use polish and the like on your nails, but Cuticle Oil is still beneficial to everyone, whether they have natural nails, gel-polish, acrylics, gel enhancements, or even pedicures. It is a product that strengthens the cuticles and helps make them healthy. Your cuticles protect your nails. When your cuticles are in good condition, it helps you to grow stronger, healthier nails.

*Product only available in the UK

Tuesday, 30 January 2018

Benefits of Cuticle Oil Day 2

Yesterday I hinted at some of the benefits of using Cuticle Oil.  Today I am going to expand on that and explain the benefits Cuticle Oil can have for your skin. 



Do you have dry cuticles? 

Maybe you think it is because your hands are always in water or because you don't give your feet much attention. You don't want to have unsightly looking cuticles. Your cuticles protect the nail by sealing off the opening between the nail and skin. Healthy ones are soft and supple. If your cuticles are in good condition, your nails usually will be, too. If your cuticles are dry, cracked, flaky or thick, don't try to cut them off as you will adding to the risk of infection getting into your body.

If you start using Cuticle Oil regularly it will make a great job of repairing the skin around your nails. You can apply it to your skin every day as much as you need to. You may think that hand or foot cream is enough and you are right to continue using that, but Cuticle Oil is better at repairing the sensitive skin around the nails. Its highly concentrated and it absorbs quickly so it starts doing its magic immediately. It softens and conditions your cuticles, so you’ll be less likely to pick at them. Plus, it adds moisture to the skin, which makes your skin healthier and younger looking. Finally, it shrinks and tightens the skin, which helps prevent hangnails.

The Happy Foot Clinic Cuticle Oil
*Product only available in the UK

Monday, 29 January 2018

Benefits of Cuticle Oil Day 1

Have you ever suffered from dry cracked Cuticles?
Have you struggled to keep your Cuticles healthy?
Are you looking for a Cuticle treatment that uses Natural ingredients?

Thank you for taking your time to read this because what you will read here will help you with your cuticle health.

I am Melanie and I am a Qualified Foot Health Practitioner and owner of the Happy Foot Clinic. I hold a professional qualification that is governed by the Alliance of Foot Health Practitioners and monitored by the Professional Standards Authority. I have been a Foot Health Practitioner for over 5 years and during this time I have learned a lot about feet, foot health and nail/cuticle health in general. My passion is to see people with healthy feet and nails/cuticles and it is because of this passion that I have started my own range of products to help people like you to care for your foot, nail/cuticle and hand health in the best way possible.

Who is this product for? 

Well, if you have dry, cracked or thick cuticles on your hands and/or feet then this is for you. If you want to keep your cuticles looking healthy and supple then this is for you. If you can stick to a daily beauty routine where you regularly apply product to your cuticles then this is for you. It may not be for someone who is not able to regularly look after their cuticle health.

What are the benefits of Cuticle Oil and why should you use it in your Hand and Foot care routine?

Cuticle oil softens skin, repairs cuticles, and extends the life of a manicure.

Cuticle oil protects the skin, improves nail growth, and keeps a manicure looking beautiful longer.


The Happy Foot Clinic Cuticle Oil 

*Product only available in the UK



Saturday, 27 January 2018

Why your Stance and Posture matter

Did you know that how you stand will affect your health? Poor posture can cause neck ache, back ache, sore hips and knees. If you slouch or are constantly looking down as you walk, then your posture will be affected and the damage can be long term. It is becoming increasingly common to see people looking at mobile phones when they walk and this is affecting their posture tremendously because their upper back is rounded and their shoulders and back will become stiff.  If you stand and walk correctly then you will have less issues with your posture and your neck, shoulders, back, hips, knees and ankles will all thank you in the long term. More than that good posture makes you look more confident and engaged with your surroundings and the people in it. 
People will shuffle into my clinic with all kinds of aches and pain, because ultimately the problem ends up affecting your feet. But more than that, your posture will affect how efficiently your body works.  If you slouch and don't stand correctly it will mean that your body will use more energy.  Distribute your weight in the most optimal way and stand the right way and your body will benefit.  Your stance needs to be equal so that when viewed from the side you can draw a vertical line that passes through the ear, shoulder, hip and falls to the front of the ankle.  You will have better lung capacity, while your digestive system will work in the most optimal way.  When your centre of gravity is above your feet to keep your balance will require very little muscular energy.  Stand well, and your body will work better.
  • Keeps bones and joints in the correct alignment so that muscles are being used properly.
  • Helps decrease the abnormal wearing of joint surfaces that could result in arthritis.
  • Decreases the stress on the ligaments holding the joints of the spine together.
  • Prevents the spine from becoming fixed in abnormal positions.
  • Prevents fatigue because muscles are being used more efficiently, allowing the body to use less energy.
  • Prevents strain or overuse problems.
  • Prevents backache and muscular pain.
  • Contributes to a good appearance.

Tuesday, 23 January 2018

5 Ways to Relax After Work Part 2

For me this weekend is particularly busy as I am on a course. If you have ever had to do a course on a weekend then you will now how tiring it can be. However, it is important at the end of a tiring day to try and unwind a little and relax. Here are some ways you can try to help you do this.

Visualize

Visualization is another great form of relaxation. All you have to do is to close your eyes and imagine. Instead of trying to empty your mind of negative thoughts, the visualization process allows you to focus on the more positive ones. Mental images of the sea or a beautiful park have great calming effects, therefore, they can help you wind down from a hectic day. With these beautiful sceneries embedded in your mind, you’ll be drifting off to sleep in no time.
Unwind to good music
Music has an incredible healing power over people’s anxieties because of its ability to connect to their emotions. Whether you prefer to listen to soothing jazz music, the latest dance record, or the sounds of nature, what matters most is to choose a type of music, which makes you feel good. However, most experts advise that the best way to relax at home after work is to listen to soft instrumental or classical music.

Take a warm bath

You cannot go wrong with a hot shower or a long warm bath. Water has a calming effect on the body, mind and soul, so don’t forget to cleanse away your troubles by soaking into a scented bubble bath after a tiring day at work.

Exercise

For some people, relaxation means hitting the gym after work. You may think that working out when you’re tired may sound like a terrible idea, but exercising always has a very positive effect on the body and the mind of a person. Any physical activity – whether it’s running on the treadmill or just running on the spot – releases endorphins that make you feel happy.
You don’t have to go to the gym to exercise. You can go for a quick jog around your house or your neighbourhood, do some crunches, or pump up the volume of your favourite music and dance in your living room.
Get a back massage
Most of the time at the end of every day, all that hard-working people look forward to is to lie down on a comfortable bed and get a good back massage. Massaging can ease the knots in your muscles, thereby calming your nerves. You don’t have to book an appointment at the spa for this. Why not get a home service from a professional massage therapist? Better yet, have your partner massage your back for you. Always keep massage oils handy or within easy reach.
Source

Monday, 22 January 2018

5 ways to Relax after Work Part 1

If you ever come home wound up after a day at work then you need to learn how to wind yourself down. Work is a big part of your life, but don't let it take over your down time as that is for you. Here are some tips on how to do relax that might help you.



Keep your work obligations at work

The first crucial step to relaxing at home after work hours is to actually stop stressing and thinking about work. Peace of mind is impossible if you continue to worry about the litany of tasks that require your attention. So, the moment you step out of your office cubicle, leave your worries and troubles where they belong on your table. Enjoy the world outside the confines of your office and switch off your mobile phone once you get home.
Change into comfortable clothes
If you want to really relax at home after work, you have to feel cozy enough in your own clothes to laze about or romp around in your own abode. Kick off your shoes, slip out of your 3-piece corporate attire, and change into something comfy like a loose t-shirt and baggy pair of shorts or pants.
Stretch
Sitting down all day in the office can leave you stressed, tired, and feeling cramped and grumpy. Doing some quick stretches at home (or even at work) will relieve you of muscle tension and help you relax in the process.
You can also try different relaxation exercises that help you to relax at home after work. 
Hydrate
Drink lots of water. Your body tends to become dehydrated when you’re stressed out, so it is important to hydrate often.

Meditate

Meditation can allay tension and anxiety. However, you don’t have to attend yoga class or retreat to the woods to meditate and relax at home after work. A few minutes of peace and quiet are enough to calm you down after a highly stressful day. Find a quiet corner in your house, close your eyes, take several deep breaths, and let peace take over your mind.
Source

Sunday, 21 January 2018

The weather!

I wouldn't be a proper Englishwoman if I didn't talk about the weather.  Yes, you may wonder what the obsession is with the English and the weather.  It's just the weather right?  Yesterday was fairly mild and a bit wet.  A few days before that it was gale force winds.  Today it's snow and it's really coming down now, which is worrying if you're planning on going out later.  Yes the weather over here is a bit of an enigma.  People think about it all the time, they constantly check the weather forecasts.  If the weather does anything unexpected like snow a bit more for instance it makes the headlines and the news.  Want something to talk about?  How about the weather?  You're bound to get some good mileage out of that subject.  Got nothing else to say?  Well, there's always the weather.  Yes, we do like to talk about the weather over here in the UK.  Now, what shall I do next?  Well, better check the weather look like there is going to be a lot of snow today...


Thursday, 18 January 2018

Mentoring

If you have a business then it is a must that you have mentoring for yourself and your business.  You cannot work in a bubble and maybe your business is successful to an extent, but there are sure to be things that you are doing that you could be doing better or more effectively.  Once a month I go and meet my mentors.  So I'm not a big business, but there are plenty of things I can learn and need to do to make my business more effective.  Until you try it you don't realise how much you need to know, how much you should or could have done for your business.  You may think it is an unnecessary expense, but if you don't invest in your business then you cannot expect it to grow or be better.

Wednesday, 17 January 2018

Do you Believe in yourself?

I believe that you have to make things happen because if you don't you will always live in regret. I started my business because I believed it would give me the chance for personal freedom, the chance to take responsibility for my life and my development, the chance to make something better for myself and for other people. If you don't believe you can do something you will never try and never do anything about the rut you are in, or the things that bother you. My business has started small and there are people out there that are far smarter, cleverer, have better business sense and acumen than me and have gone way past what I have achieved so far with my business. Does this stop me from trying? You can't compare yourself to the successes of others. You can admire them and try to learn from them for sure. You can look at what you are doing and ask yourself what can I change to make this work better? Just because you think you're failing doesn't mean you are. It just means you need to accept where you are right now and do everything you can tomorrow and the next day to put yourself where you truly want to be.

So often you become stifled by the surroundings you are in and the people you are with.  You take on board mindsets and ideals that do not suit who you are and you live them without realising it.  Suddenly you wake up and realise you are unhappy and unfulfilled in your life, but don't know how you ended up where you are.  Changing what I believed about myself and my life radically changed it.  It gives you the impetus to do something different and to really focus on what you can do differently.  If you don't you'll still be in the same rut year in year out and wondering where your life is going so fast.  Time is your friend as much as it is your enemy.  Don't let the years that have gone turn into ones of regret.  Believe in yourself that you can do amazing things and you will.  Let your future be filled with promise, hope and the belief that what you are doing is going to change something for the better.

Tuesday, 16 January 2018

How can you be a better speaker?

Public Speaking is an art and often or not you probably don't realise that the skills you need for this can be used in more than one place.  For instance, you may think that public speaking is all about talking in front of large numbers of people, but in truth any scenario where you have a message to pass on is also a form of speaking.  You need to give a presentation to your colleagues?  Well, you need to be able to do that effectively.  You need to get that job?  Yup, you need to be able to speak convincingly and persuasively to stand out and above the other candidates.  
There is a lot of noise out there, and in our own ways we are all trying to be heard.  How are you going to get your message out in a more effective way? 

Monday, 15 January 2018

Ways to give a Great Speech

This week is a big week for me as I am giving my first paid for speech. Ok it is not a huge audience or life changing money, but it is my first. I am apprehensive about it and I want to make it work so I have been practising. Here are some public speaking tips that may help you if you are in the same situation.

1. Journal your Experiences

It is always best to speak from experiences. People have a short-term memory’s. If we do not keep a journal of the experiences, all the good stories will be forgotten.

2. Observe Great Presentations

As children we learn most of things by modelling what our parents, siblings, teachers or friends. The same is true with speeches. You should copy, imbibe good characteristics by watching truly amazing speakers.

You see, we are in an age where all presentations are available just a click away in www.Youtube.com or www.TED.com. By sitting in your couch, you can watch Steve Jobs classic Stanford commencement speech, “Live before you die“). Or you can watch how Tony Robbins gives an awesome talk ‘Why we do what we do’. All the good stuff is out there for free. You just need to get into a habit of regularly watching these presentations with an eye for the little things that can help you improve your own public speaking.

3. Being Health Conscious

What does health have to do with speaking? It might sound silly but if you want to be a good presenter, you need to take care of your health.

4. Find a Mentor

Even though there are many public speaking tips you can find and learn on your own, there is nothing like having a mentor.

A mentor can show you areas that you won’t be able to see. A mentor can advise you on what is right, what is wrong and how to do it correctly. You might ask: “how do you find a mentor?” It is simple. Anybody who is good in public speaking can be your mentor. If you have a relationship with someone good at public speaking, ask him to mentor you. In fact a mentor could be your co-worker or teacher, or your friend.

5. Ask “WHY”

Do you feel nervous or have some sort of fear when someone asks you to give a presentation? Many of us do. This habit will help you dissolve that fear.

The habit of asking WHY you are giving the presentation is fundamental to overcome your anxiety. It gives some direction to your presentation.

The presentation planner could be anyone – a priest in your church, or principal of a school, or a social activist running an orphanage. Sometimes, you might not get a direct answer for your WHY. In that case, use your common sense and find the possible reasons. Suppose the priest asks you to talk to young children at church and he does not give specific answers for your WHY, the possible reason could be that the priest wants the children to get inspired and do better in life. Answering the WHY will help you with clarity about your presentation.

6. Write Down the Presentation Content

Are you a natural speaker? Do you think, “I am going to speak, why should I write it down?”

There are natural speaker’s out there, who can give solid speeches off the cuff, without having a single word written down. That is, however, the exception. For most people writing down the presentation is the only way to deliver a clear presentation. Even those “natural speakers” can usually do a better job with some form of outline to make sure their narrative does not wander.

7. Internalise the Content

Have you ever forgot some content in middle of a talk and rolled your eyes?

Internalising your presentation will help you solve this problem. Internalising is the process where you start drilling the content, as many times as possible till you no longer have to think about the words. 

8. Care for the Audience

When you are “live” before an audience, do you get concerned about what the audience will think about your language, clothes, background, etc.? These things matter to a certain extent, but they are not worth your attention when delivering a speech.

As a speaker, people are generally classified into three levels.

  • You are only concerned about you. You think: “Am I going to deliver without making any mistakes”, “Am I dressed properly”, etc.
  • You are concerned about your content. You think: “Is the listener getting what I am saying” or “Is my message good enough for them”. You can get flustered if there are any disturbances such as PowerPoint do not work, or power shuts down, etc.
  • You really care for the audience. Whatever the situation, you will be cool. You are only concerned about making a difference in your listener’s life. You present with genuine love and care in your heart. This will help you to care for your audience and you’ll really Rock! Irrespective of the mistakes, nervousness, the one who cares more for the audience, wins.

9. Get Feedback

Have you filled a customer satisfaction form in a restaurant? Why do they do that? They want to get better. They want to know what was good and what was bad.

Can we use this concept for our presentations? Absolutely. Get feedback from your audience. That doesn’t mean that you will bombard them with a long list of questions. Just ask them few simple questions such as: “If I could ask you one key thing you learned from my presentation – What would it be?” or ““Did you feel that something could be done differently?”

However, you should not get flustered if someone gives you a critical feedback. I’ll tell you a secret to process feedback. If an expert gives you a feedback, 99% of the time, the feedback will help you even if it is critical. However, if a regular listener gives you feedback, check if it makes sense. If not, get feedback from more people and see the pattern. 1 person can be wrong but 10 people cannot be wrong.

10. Review the Presentation

Do you know who is the best person to judge your presentation? You probably guessed it right. It is YOU.

Try the following. Next time, when you give a talk, ask your friend to video record your presentation. Then, review the video. You’ll be humbled. You might see – repeated gesturing, unnecessary movements, and 100 other areas of improvement. Do not get overwhelmed. Just ask yourself: “What one thing can be done better?” Take one obvious area and work on the same. Once you overcome that, focus on the next item. You’ll grow leaps and bounds as a speaker.

Source

Sunday, 14 January 2018

Blue Monday? Let's make it into something better


January can be a bit of a drag, but according to many the third Monday of this Month is also the saddest day of the year.  This is the day when you may be waking up and getting ready to go back to your J O B after what felt like a really short weekend and possibly you're not relishing that prospect for a number of reasons.  Maybe you don't feel your job is for you, you're not getting the personal and career development that you need to prosper financially and spiritually.  Maybe you don't feel valued or respected and your working relationships are not good and at best shallow.  The Christmas break with all the colours and good food etc seems an age away, while you indulged a bit more on presents and having a good time so your credit card, bank overdraft etc are not as healthy as you would like them to be.  Your salary doesn't seem to stretch far enough and January goes on forever right? - so money is really tight right now.  You're stalling on your New Years resolutions, so it's no surprise that today when factored in with all these other things means you're not feeling your happiest.  

Commonly referred to as "Blue Monday".
According to many sources and a (not so scientific) mathematical formula, it's the single saddest day of the year…

[W + (D-d)] x T^Q / M x NA
Where W=Weather...
D=Post-holiday debt...
d=Your monthly salary...
T=Time since Christmas...
Q=Time since slipping on your 2018 resolutions...
M=Your motivation, and...
NA=Your need to take action.

But don't worry.  It will get better.  You will get your momentum and motivation back.  Focus on the good things and sit an work out how you can fix the things that aren't so wonderful right now.  All it needs is a bit of organisation, forethought and the fortitude to see it through.  Need to lose some of those extra pounds you put on? Take a short walk each day.  Need to save some money?  Cut back on some of those calorie filled indulgences.  Struggling to keep your resolutions?  Put them somewhere where you can see them everyday, add some pictures to them to help you focus on your end goal, get a friend or family member to hold you accountable for keeping them.  Want another job?  Start thinking about the job you really want and begin looking into ways you can make that happen.  Nothing happens overnight, but instead of this being Blue Monday, let's make it Turnaround Monday when you turnaround your life and get it back on track.


Friday, 12 January 2018

Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 10


The natural result of low confidence is inaction. When women hesitate because we aren’t sure, we hold ourselves back.

We found perhaps the most striking illustration of how the connection between action and confidence might play out to women’s benefit in Milan. There we tracked down Zachary Estes, a research psychologist who’s long been curious about the confidence disparity between men and women. A few years ago, he gave 500 students a series of tests that involved reorganizing 3‑D images on a computer screen. He was testing a couple of things—the idea that confidence can be manipulated and the idea that, in some areas, women have less of it than men.

When Estes had the students solve a series of these spatial puzzles, the women scored measurably worse than the men did. But when he looked at the results more closely, he found that the women had done poorly because they hadn’t even attempted to answer a lot of the questions. So he repeated the experiment, this time telling the students they had to at least try to solve all the puzzles. And guess what: the women’s scores increased sharply, matching the men’s. Maddening. Yet also hopeful.

Estes’s work illustrates a key point: the natural result of low confidence is inaction. When women don’t act, when we hesitate because we aren’t sure, we hold ourselves back. But when we do act, even if it’s because we’re forced to, we perform just as well as men do.

Using a different test, Estes asked everyone to answer every question. Both the men and the women got 80 percent right, suggesting identical ability levels. He then tested the students again and asked them, after each question, to report their confidence in their answer. Just having to think about whether they felt certain of their answer changed their ability to do well. The women’s scores dipped to 75 percent, while the men’s jumped to 93. One little nudge asking women how sure they are about something rattles their world, while the same gesture reminds men that they’re terrific.

Finally, Estes decided to attempt a direct confidence boost. He told some members of the group, completely at random, that they had done very well on the previous test. On the next test they took, those men and women improved their scores dramatically. It was a clear measure of how confidence can be self-perpetuating.

These results could not be more relevant to understanding the confidence gap, and figuring out how to close it. What doomed the women in Estes’s lab was not their actual ability to do well on the tests. They were as able as the men were. What held them back was the choice they made not to try.

The advice implicit in such findings is hardly unfamiliar: to become more confident, women need to stop thinking so much and just act. And yet, there is something very powerful about this prescription, aligning as it does with everything research tells us about the sources of female reticence.

Almost daily, new evidence emerges of just how much our brains can change over the course of our lives, in response to shifting thought patterns and behaviour. If we keep at it, if we channel our talent for hard work, we can make our brains more confidence-prone. What the neuroscientists call plasticity, we call hope.


Source

Thursday, 11 January 2018

Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 9

Women may be valued in the work place, but it is often men that get to rise to the top.  

Our friend had come to rely on and value Rebecca, but she had a feeling it was Robert’s star that would rise. It was only a matter of time before one of his many ideas would strike the right note, and he’d be off and running—probably, our friend was beginning to fear, while Rebecca was left behind, enjoying the respect of her colleagues but not a higher salary, more responsibilities, or a more important title.

Here’s a thorny question: If Rebecca did behave just like Robert, exhibiting his kind of confidence, what would her boss think then? There is evidence that Rebecca wouldn’t fare so well, whether her boss was male or female.

Which is why any discussion of this subject requires a major caveat. Yes, women suffer consequences for their lack of confidence—but when they do behave assertively, they may suffer a whole other set of consequences, ones that men don’t typically experience. Attitudes toward women are changing, and for the better, but a host of troubling research shows that they can still pay a heavier social and even professional penalty than men do for acting in a way that’s seen as aggressive. If a woman walks into her boss’s office with unsolicited opinions, speaks up first at meetings, or gives business advice above her pay grade, she risks being disliked or even—let’s be blunt—being labeled a bitch. The more a woman succeeds, the worse the vitriol seems to get. It’s not just her competence that’s called into question; it’s her very character.

Back at the Yale School of Management, Victoria Brescoll has tested the thesis that the more senior a woman is, the more she makes a conscious effort to play down her volubility—the reverse of how most men handle power. In the first of two experiments, she asked 206 participants, both men and women, to imagine themselves as either the most senior figure or the most junior figure in a meeting. Then she asked them how much they’d talk. Those men who’d imagined themselves as the senior figure reported that they would talk more; men who’d picked the junior position said they’d talk less. But women who’d selected the high-ranking role said they would talk the same amount as those women who’d envisioned themselves as the low-ranking woman. Asked why, they said they didn’t want to be disliked, or seem out of line. In Brescoll’s next experiment, men and women rated a fictitious female CEO who talked more than other people. The result: both sexes viewed this woman as significantly less competent and less suited to leadership than a male CEO who talked for the same amount of time. When the female CEO was described as talking less than others, her perceived competency shot up.

So confident women can find themselves in a catch-22. For now, though, for Rebecca and for most women, coming across as too confident is not the problem.

When we embarked on this quest two years ago, we had a slight conflict of interest. As journalists, we were exhilarated by the puzzle of why high-achieving women were so lacking in confidence, but as women, we grew gloomy. Delving into research and interviews, we more than once found ourselves wondering whether the entire female sex was doomed to feel less than self-assured. Biology, upbringing, society: all seemed to be conspiring against women’s confidence.

But as our understanding of this elusive quality shifted, we began to see the outlines of a remedy. Confidence is not, as we once believed, just feeling good about yourself. If women simply needed a few words of reassurance, they’d have commandeered the corner office long ago. Perhaps the clearest, and most useful, definition of confidence we came across was the one supplied by Richard Petty, a psychology professor at Ohio State University, who has spent decades focused on the subject. “Confidence,” he told us, “is the stuff that turns thoughts into action.” Of course, other factors also contribute to action. “If the action involves something scary, then what we call courage might also be needed,” Petty explained. “Or if it’s difficult, a strong will to persist might also be needed. Anger, intelligence, creativity can play a role.” But confidence, he told us, is essential, because it applies in more situations than these other traits do. It is the factor that turns thoughts into judgments about what we are capable of, and that then transforms those judgments into action.

The simplicity is compelling, and the notion that confidence and action are interrelated suggests a virtuous circle. Confidence is a belief in one’s ability to succeed, a belief that stimulates action. In turn, taking action bolsters one’s belief in one’s ability to succeed. So confidence accumulates—through hard work, through success, and even through failure.


Source




Wednesday, 10 January 2018

Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 8

What doomed the women was not their actual ability to do well on the tests. They were as able as the men were. What held them back was the choice not to try.

And yet the result is that many girls learn to avoid taking risks and making mistakes. This is to their detriment: many psychologists now believe that risk taking, failure, and perseverance are essential to confidence-building. Boys, meanwhile, tend to absorb more scolding and punishment, and in the process, they learn to take failure in stride. “When we observed in grade school classrooms, we saw that boys got eight times more criticism than girls for their conduct,” Dweck writes in Mindset. Complicating matters, she told us, girls and boys get different patterns of feedback. “Boys’ mistakes are attributed to a lack of effort,” she says, while “girls come to see mistakes as a reflection of their deeper qualities.”

Boys also benefit from the lessons they learn—or, more to the point, the lessons they teach one another—during recess and after school. From kindergarten on, they roughhouse, tease one another, point out one another’s limitations, and call one another morons and slobs. In the process, Dweck contends, such evaluations “lose a lot of their power.” Boys thus make one another more resilient. Other psychologists we spoke with believe that this playground mentality encourages them later, as men, to let other people’s tough remarks slide off their backs. Similarly, on the sports field, they learn not only to relish wins but also to flick off losses.


Too many girls, by contrast, miss out on really valuable lessons outside of school. We all know that playing sports is good for kids, but we were surprised to learn just how extensive the benefits are, and how relevant to confidence. Studies evaluating the impact of the 1972 Title IX legislation, which made it illegal for public schools to spend more on boys’ athletics than on girls’, have found that girls who play team sports are more likely to graduate from college, find a job, and be employed in male-dominated industries. There’s even a direct link between playing sports in high school and earning a bigger salary as an adult. Learning to own victory and survive defeat in sports is apparently good training for owning triumphs and surviving setbacks at work. And yet, despite Title IX, fewer girls than boys participate in athletics, and many who do quit early. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, girls are still six times as likely as boys to drop off sports teams, with the steepest decline in participation coming during adolescence. This is probably because girls suffer a larger decrease in self-esteem during that time than do boys.

What a vicious circle: girls lose confidence, so they quit competing, thereby depriving themselves of one of the best ways to regain it. They leave school crammed full of interesting historical facts and elegant Spanish subjunctives, proud of their ability to study hard and get the best grades, and determined to please. But somewhere between the classroom and the cubicle, the rules change, and they don’t realize it. They slam into a work world that doesn’t reward them for perfect spelling and exquisite manners. The requirements for adult success are different, and their confidence takes a beating.

Consider the following tale of two employees. A female friend of ours in New York was supervising two 20‑something junior staffers, one female (whom we will call Rebecca) and one male (whom we will call Robert). Even though Robert had been on the job for only a few months, he was already stopping by our friend’s office to make off-the-cuff pitches for new ad campaigns, to comment on business strategy, and to share unsolicited opinions about magazine articles he’d recently read. Our friend often found herself shooting down his ideas, correcting his misperceptions, and sending him off for further research. “No problem” seemed to be his attitude. Sometimes he’d respond with a counterargument; other times, he’d grin and shrug his shoulders as he headed back to his desk. A few days later, he’d be back in to pitch more ideas and to update her on what he was doing, even if all he had to say was “I’m still working on this.”

Our friend was struck by how easily Robert engaged her, and how markedly different his behavior was from that of Rebecca, with whom she’d worked for several years. Rebecca still made appointments to speak with her and always prepared a list of issues for their discussions. She was mostly quiet in meetings with clients, focused as she was on taking careful notes. She never blurted out her ideas; she wrote them up with comprehensive analyses of pros and cons. Rebecca was prepared and hardworking, and yet, even though our friend was frequently annoyed by Robert’s assertiveness, she was more impressed by him. She admired his willingness to be wrong and his ability to absorb criticism without being discouraged. Rebecca, by contrast, took negative feedback hard, sometimes responding with tears and a trip to her own office to collect herself before the conversation could continue.


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Tuesday, 9 January 2018

Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 7


Girls are often more behaved than boys, but why is this? 

There’s a downside to testosterone, to be sure. As we’ve just seen, higher levels of the hormone fuel risk taking, and winning yields still more testosterone. This dynamic, sometimes known as the “winner effect,” can be dangerous: animals can become so aggressive and overconfident after winning fights that they take fatal risks. Moreover, a testosterone-laced decision isn’t always a better one. In research conducted at University College London, women who were given testosterone were less able to collaborate, and wrong more often. And several studies of female hedge-fund managers show that taking the longer view and trading less can pay off: investments run by female hedge-fund managers outperform those run by male managers.

So what are the implications of all this? The essential chicken-and-egg question still to be answered is to what extent these differences between men and women are inherent, and to what extent they are a result of life experiences. The answer is far from clear-cut, but new work on brain plasticity is generating growing evidence that our brains do change in response to our environment. Even hormone levels may be less preordained than one might suppose: researchers have found that testosterone levels in men decline when they spend more time with their children.

For some clues about the role that nurture plays in the confidence gap, let’s look to a few formative places: the elementary-school classroom, the playground, and the sports field. School is where many girls are first rewarded for being good, instead of energetic, rambunctious, or even pushy. But while being a “good girl” may pay off in the classroom, it doesn’t prepare us very well for the real world. As Carol Dweck, a Stanford psychology professor and the author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, put it to us: “If life were one long grade school, women would be the undisputed rulers of the world.”

It’s easier for young girls than for young boys to behave: As is well established, they start elementary school with a developmental edge in some key areas. They have longer attention spans, more-advanced verbal and fine-motor skills, and greater social adeptness. They generally don’t charge through the halls like wild animals, or get into fights during recess. Soon they learn that they are most valuable, and most in favour, when they do things the right way: neatly and quietly. “Girls seem to be more easily socialized,” Dweck says. “They get a lot of praise for being perfect.” In turn, they begin to crave the approval they get for being good. There’s certainly no harm intended by overworked, overstressed teachers (or parents). Who doesn’t want a kid who works hard and doesn’t cause a lot of trouble?


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Monday, 8 January 2018

Why are Women less Confident than Men? Part 6

So where does all of this start? If women are competent and hardworking enough to outpace men in school, why is it so difficult to keep up later on? As with so many questions involving human behaviour, both nature and nurture are implicated in the answers.

The very suggestion that male and female brains might be built differently and function in disparate ways has long been a taboo subject among women, out of fear that any difference would be used against us. For decades—for centuries, actually—differences (real or imagined) were used against us. So let’s be clear: male and female brains are vastly more alike than they are different. You can’t look at scans of two random brains and clearly identify which is male and which is female. Moreover, each individual’s confidence level is influenced by a host of genetic factors that do not seem to have anything to do with his or her sex.

Girls lose confidence, so they quit competing in sports, thereby depriving themselves of one of the best ways to regain it.

Yet male and female brains do display differences in structure and chemistry, differences that may encourage unique patterns of thinking and behavior, and that could thereby affect confidence. This is a busy area of inquiry, with a steady stream of new—if frequently contradictory, and controversial—findings. Some of the research raises the intriguing possibility that brain structure could figure into variations between the way men and women respond to challenging or threatening circumstances. Take, for example, the amygdalae, sometimes described as the brain’s primitive fear centers. They are involved in processing emotional memory and responding to stressful situations. Studies using fMRI scans have found that women tend to activate their amygdalae more easily in response to negative emotional stimuli than men do—suggesting that women are more likely than men to form strong emotional memories of negative events. This difference seems to provide a physical basis for a tendency that’s been observed in behavioral studies: compared with men, women are more apt to ruminate over what’s gone wrong in the past. Or consider the anterior cingulate cortex. This little part of the brain helps us recognize errors and weigh options; some people call it the worrywart center. And, yes, it’s larger in women. In evolutionary terms, there are undoubtedly benefits to differences like these: women seem to be superbly equipped to scan the horizon for threats. Yet such qualities are a mixed blessing today.

You could say the same about hormonal influences on cognition and behaviour. We all know testosterone and oestrogen as the forces behind many of the basic, overt differences between men and women. It turns out they are involved in subtler personality dynamics as well. The main hormonal driver for women is, of course, oestrogen. By supporting the part of the brain involved in social skills and observations, oestrogen seems to encourage bonding and connection, while discouraging conflict and risk taking—tendencies that might well hinder confidence in some contexts.

Testosterone, on the other hand, helps to fuel what often looks like classic male confidence. Men have about 10 times more testosterone pumping through their system than women do, and it affects everything from speed to strength to muscle size to competitive instinct. It is thought of as the hormone that encourages a focus on winning and demonstrating power, and for good reason. Recent research has tied high testosterone levels to an appetite for risk taking. In a series of studies, scientists from Cambridge University followed male traders at a London hedge fund, all high rollers (with annual bonuses greater than $5 million). Using saliva samples, the researchers measured the men’s testosterone levels at the start and end of each day. On days when traders began with higher levels of testosterone, they made riskier trades. When those trades paid off, their testosterone levels surged further. One trader saw his testosterone level rise 74 percent over a six-day winning streak.

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Saturday, 6 January 2018

6 Steps to More Confidence Day 6

If you have ever had to plan for an event then you will know that preparation is key. I will giving a speech today and there has been a lot of preparation for that. In fact there has been a lot of things that needed to be done and still need to be done. However there is nothing worse than going somewhere unprepared and feeling out of control because of that.

Be prepared

Remember the five P’s: Prior planning prevents poor performance. The more prepared you are, the more confident you’ll feel about your expertise and competency. Preparation will help you avoid getting tripped up by life’s unexpected glitches.
Learn everything you can about your industry, your subject matter, your goals and what drives you towards success. Before you start a task, first imagine how you want to feel once you’ve completed it. Don’t try to accomplish too much at once. Break complex tasks up into small, bite-size, manageable pieces.
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Behind the Scenes at The Happy Foot Clinic

Have you ever wondered what goes on in other people's lives?  How do they make things happen?  What projects have they got on the go?  It is hard work running your own business and 2018 is a very transitional one for me as I have now left my J O B with Leicester Police after 17 years as a member of support staff.  The Happy Foot Clinic, the new range of Cuticle oils, my role as an Ambassador for Unlimited Success and Progressive Property are now my main priorities.  Suddenly everything you do matters so much more because when your income comes from your business the responsibility for the success of that is firmly on your shoulders.

Previously you would have seen my desk where there are all sorts of things going on, but next to my desk is the sideboard, which normally just has the wii on it. I occasionally use that for the wii fit and used to use it for yoga until I joined the gym facilities at Leicester Police. Now I've left there I may go back to using it although live yoga sessions are far superior.  Keeping fit and healthy is massively important as your health will impact your ability to do a lot of things.  The tendency to get less active as you get older also impacts on your health so keeping active is also very important.  

The sideboard has now gained my podcasting equipment and I'm hoping to start seriously knuckling down to get that sorted in the next few weeks. The bio mechanics course book is still lurking although I've almost finished the book and modules in it. The grey book on it is something new. Each day now I write a vision of thankfulness for my business as if it has happened. The positive forward thinking will help focus you to push the business forward and to set higher goals. As you achieve these ends the vision will grow bigger. The blue book is my clinic diary although at the start of this year I have scheduled customers on a programme for this on my mac and now have a laptop so at some point in the future the diary may not be necessary for appointments. There is a lot of change happening with the business and there is much to think about.

Friday, 5 January 2018

6 Steps to More Confidence Day 5

Networking is not my gifting in life and certainly not my comfort zone, but sometimes to move forward you have to do just that.  At the moment I am practising for a speech that I will be delivering next week.  I must admit to being quite worried about it, but if you let things like that get to you then you'll never do anything.  Sometimes you have to push yourself to do things that you don't like.  You never know what fruits it will bring.

Take action

There’s more to being confident than just how you look. You must act the part. Walk up to a stranger at a networking event, or accept a project you’d normally reject. Practice being self-confident and soon it will become second nature.
Inaction breeds doubt and fear, while action breeds confidence and courage. As an exercise, jot down your strengths and weaknesses. Most people will tell you to work on your weaknesses, but use what you've got and capitalize on your strengths instead. Once you put more energy into your positive traits, your confidence will start to shine through.
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Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 5


Have you ever felt that you are not good enough?  It is easy to look at yourself, what you do and to decide that you're not ready for that next step whatever it may be.  The truth is in life, you can keep perfecting as you go along until you get there and when you realise that you will find it really liberating.  Think about it this way.  Many top brands we know and love were not the final version when they were launched.  They have been updated and perfected over the years.  Does this make you love them even less?  Of course not.  You may not be the best now, but that should not stop you declaring yourself now and putting yourself out there for people to see.  For if you don't you never will and more importantly no one else will see you or your achievements either.

Women applied for a promotion only when they met 100 percent of the qualifications. Men applied when they met 50 percent. 

For decades, women have misunderstood an important law of the professional jungle. It’s not enough to keep one’s head down and plug away, checking items off a list. Having talent isn’t merely about being competent; confidence is a part of that talent. You have to have it to excel.

We also began to see that a lack of confidence informs a number of familiar female habits. 

Take the penchant many women have for assuming the blame when things go wrong, while crediting circumstance—or other people—for their successes. (Men seem to do the opposite.) David Dunning, the Cornell psychologist, offered the following case in point: In Cornell’s math Ph.D. program, he’s observed, there’s a particular course during which the going inevitably gets tough. Dunning has noticed that male students typically recognize the hurdle for what it is, and respond to their lower grades by saying, “Wow, this is a tough class.” That’s what’s known as external attribution, and in a situation like this, it’s usually a healthy sign of resilience. Women tend to respond differently. When the course gets hard, Dunning told us, their reaction is more likely to be “You see, I knew I wasn’t good enough.” That’s internal attribution, and it can be debilitating.

Perfectionism is another confidence killer. 

Study after study confirms that it is largely a female issue, one that extends through women’s entire lives. We don’t answer questions until we are totally sure of the answer, we don’t submit a report until we’ve edited it ad nauseam, and we don’t sign up for that triathlon unless we know we are faster and fitter than is required. We watch our male colleagues take risks, while we hold back until we’re sure we are perfectly ready and perfectly qualified. We fixate on our performance at home, at school, at work, at yoga class, even on vacation. We obsess as mothers, as wives, as sisters, as friends, as cooks, as athletes. Bob Sullivan and Hugh Thompson, the authors of The Plateau Effect, call this tendency the “enemy of the good,” leading as it does to hours of wasted time. The irony is that striving to be perfect actually keeps us from getting much of anything done.





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Thursday, 4 January 2018

6 Steps to More Confidence Day 4

It is true that being around positive people affects you and your way of thinking.  When you are around negative people it is like you are having all the energy sapped out of you and you think less creatively.  

Think and act positively

Positive energy leads to positive outcomes, so set your mind to the can-do side of any situation, avoiding the negative self-talk that can make you feel less confident. Smile, laugh and surround yourself with happy, positive people. You’ll feel better and the people with whom you work will enjoy your company.
Keep a gratitude journal to remind yourself of the high points of your day and your accomplishments. You will develop more peace and confidence when you are in a grateful state of mind.
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Why are Women Less Confident than Men? Part 4


Have you noticed how well confident people seem to do for themselves?  Do you admire and look up to more confident people more? Have you ever felt that a confident person is less intelligent than the next person say? The truth is confidence doesn't mean you have to be intelligent and that it is not just intelligence that gains us admiration of others.

The fact is, overconfidence can get you far in life. Cameron Anderson, a psychologist who works in the business school at the University of California at Berkeley, has made a career of studying overconfidence. In 2009, he conducted some novel tests to compare the relative value of confidence and competence. He gave a group of 242 students a list of historical names and events, and asked them to tick off the ones they knew. Among the names were some well-disguised fakes: a Queen Shaddock made an appearance, as did a Galileo Lovano, and an event dubbed Murphy’s Last Ride. The experiment was a way of measuring excessive confidence, Anderson reasoned. The fact that some students checked the fakes instead of simply leaving them blank suggested that they believed they knew more than they actually did. At the end of the semester, Anderson asked the students to rate one another in a survey designed to assess each individual’s prominence within the group. The students who had picked the most fakes had achieved the highest status.

Read the Confidence, Anderson told us, matters just as much as competence. We didn’t want to believe it, and we pressed him for alternative theories. But deep down, we knew we’d seen the same phenomenon for years. Within any given organization, be it an investment bank or the PTA, some individuals tend to be more admired and more listened to than others. They are not necessarily the most knowledgeable or capable people in the room, but they are the most self-assured.


“When people are confident, when they think they are good at something, regardless of how good they actually are, they display a lot of confident nonverbal and verbal behavior,” Anderson said. He mentioned expansive body language, a lower vocal tone, and a tendency to speak early and often in a calm, relaxed manner. “They do a lot of things that make them look very confident in the eyes of others,” he added. “Whether they are good or not is kind of irrelevant.” Kind of irrelevant. Infuriatingly, a lack of competence doesn’t necessarily have negative consequences. Among Anderson’s students, those who displayed more confidence than competence were admired by the rest of the group and awarded a high social status. “The most confident people were just considered the most beloved in the group,” he said. “Their overconfidence did not come across as narcissistic.”

That is a crucial point. True overconfidence is not mere bluster. Anderson thinks the reason extremely confident people don’t alienate others is that they aren’t faking it. They genuinely believe they are good, and that self-belief is what comes across. Fake confidence, he told us, just doesn’t work in the same way. Studies Anderson is now conducting suggest that others can see the “tells.” No matter how much bravado someone musters, when he doesn’t genuinely believe he is good, others pick up on his shifting eyes and rising voice and other giveaways. Most people can spot fake confidence from a mile away.

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Clove is not just about fabulous flavour

What do you know about Clove Oil? Perhaps you're familiar with its uses in dental preparations, candies, and gum for its flavour and mou...